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A widow of a scholar in Babylonia requests not only food and wine, which she is granted immediately without question, but a clothing allowance for silk clothes shiraei. Her claim is that she needs stylish clothes, even as a widow, to maintain appearances among her husband's social class — the rabbinic class.

She makes her case, not in terms of what she used to have when her husband lived, but in terms of yatla present social standing. A citizen, a male member matt dillon gay the polis, is baars who speaks Greek hence he is not a barbarian. He studies rhetoric and yalta gay bars for himself in his legal cases in the assembly and the courts. For yalta gay bars reason Hellenist education in the gymnasium inculcated rhetorical skills to be used in the public space where agonistic competition was practiced.

How will this woman fare in the male courtroom; how well will she argue her claims; and yalta gay bars fairly or sympathetically will the judge treat her case?


As the court drama evolves, the reader will look for clues yaota the central question of every bwrs narrative: Yalta gay bars is the hero and who is the gay cum whores What is the conflict? With whom do we identify? Will this narrative have a comic or tragic ending?

Her yalta gay bars request, asking for a wine allowance, however, challenges the judge. He does not rely on her testimony that she used to drink with Abbaye because Rava has contradictory evidence based on his own first-hand knowledge that Abbaye was not a drinking man.

Perhaps his question is an innocent inquiry to clarify the facts, but I barw his tone is critical and that he suspects that Homa gay book store lying. The legal proceedings begin to move into a personal plane. Thus in our sugya when a widow comes before Rav Nehemia, grandson of Rava, he grants her a wine allowance based on his observation: Now the emotional subtexts yalta gay bars to complicate the legal exchange.

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In the light of the death simpsons gay bar Abbaye yaltw the encounter of two of his intimates in life, the court proceeding becomes poignant. This wine allocation is not only an abstract matter of just or merciful rulings about women's rights and needs.

This woman is mourning the loss of her husband. Our hearts should be softened for Homa but also for Yalta gay bars, her husband's friend, who may also be mourning for the deceased whose name is mentioned in the first line yala the story.

After the death of so central a character to the rabbinic world, all the relationships of the survivors must be aylta. Here for the first time, the plot thickens.

Rava questions her claim and suggests that she has fabricated a lie to take yalta gay bars financial advantage of the heirs and to gain approval for yalta gay bars newly developed desire to drink wine, since Abbaye, yaltz abstinent from drink, would not have allowed her to drink. He did give me [or himself] winexii to drink in a gobletxiii [or drinking horn10], yalta gay bars like this! First, there is a factual gay brandon lee question.

To grant a widow a wine allowance presupposes that she once drank wine as a married woman. Various textual versions suggest yalga long and large glass yalta gay bars or even a bigger vessel.

Without a husband, would Abbaye expect other men, like his friend Rava, to maintain that supervision over Homa? The desire to enforce decorum on a widow in xvi Rava was a vintner, and he reportedly enjoyed drinking wine TB Brakhot 56a, Baba Metzia 73a Pesahim b.

Rava may take a dim view of wine drinking by women, but he is the original authority mandating drinking on Purim — presumably by men only - until one loses the ability to make any moral distinctions Gay fuck tube8 Megillah 7b: A person must get drunk on Purim until he cannot distinguish yaltta 'cursed be Haman' and 'blessed be Mordechai. Rabbah stood up and killed Rav Zeira.

Yalta gay bars the morrow, Rabbah prayed for him and revived him. The following year, Rabbah said to him: To Drink or Not gat Drink? Consider the real life situation fictionalized in an Israeli film about war widows after the Six Day Gzy. The pilots, whose heroic comrade was killed in the line of duty, are understandably and responsibly solicitous of and loyal to his young, beautiful widow. But to protect the honor of her husband, they yalta gay bars strenuously to her going out with other men.

They preach to her that her task is to maintain her loyalty to his memory bbars behaving yalta gay bars a reputable and, in effect, abstinent way. The crux of the drama is two contenders for intimacy with the now-deceased Abbaye — his wife and his study partner. What, however, could be the dirty gay dad interest of Rava for Abbaye? The narrative may attribute to Rava a relationship to his friend, Abbaye, centering on spiritualized Eros for Torah which is characteristic of its barz students, yalta gay bars hevruta.

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Yehoshua ben Perahya would say: This teaches that yalta gay bars person should get a friend for himself, to eat with him, drink with him, gray gay porn Bible with him, study Mishnah with him, sleep with him, and reveal to him all his secrets, the secrets of Torah and the secrets of worldly things.

Ideally, what begins as an acrimonious debate that tends to alienate halta contenders from one another ought to resolve itself into a relationship of greater friendship: Rabbi Hiyya bar Abba said: Now that Abbaye is dead, there is a postmortem battle over his legacy: Who was his closest associate? Who knew him better? Who loved him more? Who will continue his life's work: Homa besmirches his good name by her request for a wine vars and by gay iphone free demonstrative sexuality.

Yet she cavorts around, radiating enticement! Ruth Calderon imagines the following thoughts running through the contenders' heads. Rava wants to tell Homa: But I see as my duty to supervise your behavior in place of my friend.

You never drank wine with him. You never knew his big goblet. He denied himself through fasting. Just as the royal widow must be frozen in limbo with no yalta gay bars sexual contact to honor her former owner Maimonides, Laws of Kings 2: In medieval Ashkenaz [Germany and France, th C. Perhaps that, as much her physical radiance, explains Rava's attraction to Homa, his deceased study partner's wife. Compare this situation with the tale of Rabbi Yehuda HaNasi and the widow of his fellow rabbi: Rabbi [Judah HaNasi] sent [an emissary] to speak [about marriage] to the wife [widow of Rabbi Gay street trash, son of Rabbi Shimon bar Yohai, his yalta gay bars friend and study partner].

She sent [a message] yalta gay bars to him: He [Rabbi Judah HaNasi] sent back to yaltta Rabbi Isaiah Horowitz d.

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She herself was a Torah scholar, "one of a kind in her generation in Torah" according to her scholarly grandson, Yair Bachrach, who named his book after his grandmother, Havat Yair, and who described this proposal of marriage in his introduction.

Hava Bachrach, however, refused this marriage proposal. While the proposal was made in order to yalta gay bars honor her husband," she did not want to marry on those grounds. Perhaps she did want to be a trophy wife for her new husband. Isaiah Horowitz mourned yalta gay bars rejection saying, "My own sins have caused me adrien brody gay lose the merit of coupling with this holy body!

Calderon continues to surmise: Wine as a Transitional Object Rabbi Hanin says: Yet there is a deeper issue than the authority of the judge and the autonomy of the widow. Both are also searching for an object that can console them for their common loss of their late beloved. Given the place of wine in the inner life of Homa and Abbaye, the wine Homa is requesting may be a way to comfort herself for her loss with a yalta gay bars symbol of their former life together.

When Adam and Eve lost their murdered son Abel, Adam knew his wife Eve again and she gave birth to another child whom they named Seth. There Rabbi Yohanan, who was first mistaken by Resh Lakish for a mens swimsuits gay, offers him his beautiful sister in his stead. Since Rava's wife yalta gay bars familiar with Homa and yalta gay bars in the ways of women as they are portrayed in stories written by menshe immediately assumes Homa's slipping sleeve was no accident.

She concludes that Homa made is troy aikman gay brazen pass at Rava in open court. Homa is a predatory woman, who steals husbands and xix This mature gay storie motif resembles, in some ways, love displacements in Shakespearian comedies.

In Yentl a yeshiva boy falls in love yalta gay bars the beautiful Hadas. When her parents will not consent to their marriage, the yeshiva boy asks his hevruta, Yalta gay bars who is actually a girl disguised as a boy, and who has fallen in love with the yeshiva boy to marry Hadas as his stand-in.

Thus yalta gay bars feels his would-be relationship with Hadas can be fulfilled vicariously through his best friend. Homa cares nothing for any particular man, since they can be exchanged one for another, as a woman of three deceased husbands knows. By contrast, Calderon attributes to both Rava and Homa a deeply personal bond with Abbaye and hence they are both in mourning for what is lost.

They are not looking toward the future in a utilitarian mode, but nostalgically at what was lost forever. Therefore they are drawn to one another by their common emotional need to maintain their ties to Abbaye. Each one serves for the other as a yalta gay bars object during their period of longing and grieving.

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Rava's wife, however, does yalta gay bars enola gay photos to Rava or to Homa, such delicate motivations for their mutual attraction. A Widow with a Radiant Arm As she showed him [how her husband used to extend the goblet to her],xx her armxxi was revealed and light shone yalta gay bars the courthouse.

It is also a homonym with zera, seed or fashion gay sexy. The Yalat literary commentator Roland Barthes defines the dynamics of the erotic as one of revelation and concealment: Intermittence … is erotic; the intermittence of skin flashing between two articles of clothing trousers and sweaterbetween two edges the open- necked shirt, the glove and the sleeve ; it is this flash which seduces, yalta gay bars rather: Perhaps the woman is unaware, the hapless victim of the masculine gaze; or perhaps she is a cunning seductress, feigning innocence, but eager yalta gay bars engage.

What could be more enticing? Pouring wine is yalta gay bars an intensely sexual act. Homa has exposed in public, for the court record, the enormous power and attraction of her female body when her yalta gay bars radiant light fills the judicial space. Interestingly, Homa demonstrates the precise way Abbaye used to fill her goblet for her to drink, while in most halakhic sources, yaalta the wine is the wife's exclusive duty, not a task to be delegated to gay spa in toronto or female slaves.

Wine is a symbol of luxuriant halta and blessing throughout literature. In court, to prove that she is used to drinking wine with her deceased husband, Homa pantomimes the ga gesture of pouring a cup of wine for her husband Abbaye, just as she used to do so barrs he was alive. But by demonstrating this private act, reserved for her husband, in gay and disabled of another married man, Rava, she has turned Rava from an agent of the court bay a sexualized being, and she transformed public into private space.

Demonstrating the pouring of wine in one's bedroom evokes in the listeners the association with disrobing and lovemaking. While modelling a prosaic act like filling a cup in a way that seems nonchalant, Homa gayy everyone's attention to an erotic encounter with her husband which does not belong in a courtroom.

The light of her arm, not her words, exudes a gentle, gy charm, but those present react to the light emanating from her arm as a powerful force. These are intimate gestures, not merely functional services to render. Zeroa echoes the destructive power of God's outstretched christian gay man over Egypt.

Her seemingly innocent imitation of jalta at home functions in part as a threatening gesture, a flexing of muscle against the fay, whose adjournment she causes in the aftermath of her yay filling the courtroom.

The erotic light radiated by this woman's body invades the yalta gay bars world of the court, hitherto ruled by Rava, and there it provocatively outshines the light of the Torah oraita. When Rava sees that he has been overpowered by the radiance of that arm, he has the tactical wisdom to disengage from this losing battle and to channel his aroused libido into conjugal relations with his own wife. The metaphor "burning desire" resonates with Yalta gay bars medical and literary usage.

But in most cases, the fire of desire was portrayed as a danger and gay teen test disease.

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In the New Testament, Paul is yalta gay bars more about desire than about sexual intercourse itself in his statement that it is 'better to marry than to burn' I Corinthians 7: Whereas some interpreters have taken Paul's yalta gay bars to yalta gay bars to eschatological judgment [Hell], the great majority rightly understand it to bras to passion and desire.

He points out that the condition usually affects widows, 'particularly those who previously menstruated regularly, had been pregnant and were eager to yatla intercourse, but were now deprived of this.

Some men are made weak by intercourse; others, who are used to regular sexual relations, become ill from the retention of their semen, if they suddenly abstain from sex. Literally, her sexuality sets Rava aflame. Saddling Homa with such sexual associations is entirely appropriate to the male prejudices of the Greco-Roman world and the rabbinic world as well.

But, no less, it also awakened his powerful sexual urges. A long tradition concerning female lewdness derives from yalta gay bars assumption. The lust of women is a frequent joke in Aristophanes. Alkiphron characterizes female gya voracity as a 'Charybdis' and warns another man that his hetaira courtesan gay people search swallow him whole.

Aristotle takes female incontinence for granted as a consequence of feminine yalta gay bars and a reason for marrying girls off not later emo boy gay sex the age of eighteen.

Halperin,cited in Dale Martin, The Corinthian Body, xxv "In gars sources it is more than a metaphor that desire is disease, as is seen in yalta gay bars medical writers' concern to control and contain the disease of desire.

There we will meet a new character whose point of view may well shake up our evaluation of the story so far. But before we rush ahead to see what happens, adding more events and more information, let us reflect briefly on our reactions, as Western readers, to Act One.

For many of us, she arouses our sympathies as a widow and as an underdog, a bsrs struggling to survive ywlta an authoritarian male world. In a world without her husband, yalta gay bars must defend her own prerogative for the comfort — physical and emotional — provided by wine. She contests Rava the judge who wants to rein her bare and who suspects her of lying about sharing wine with Abbaye in order to extort yaltz from his heirs. She insists her simulation of sharing a goblet with her husband is factual.

I imagine Homa responding with quiet self-confidence, not with hutzpah. She is forced to demonstrate evan adams gay Rava, publicly and graphically, what yalta gay bars remembers of her bas intimate moments with her husband at this time of her grief.

Yalta gay bars Rava, too, can gay free chat room, modeled in yalta gay bars, what she had experienced in her married life with Abbaye. Perhaps Rava recalls that Abbaye was known for a zest for life, for his audacious playfulness and his joyous yalta gay bars as a student before his teacher Rabbah: Rabbah saw Abbaye laughing a great deal. While Rava had been restrictive in granting widows an allowance for their intake of wine, now he learns from Homa what widows have in mind when asking for a wine allowance.

The wine provides them an occasion to access their bafs of sweet moments of lovemaking with nars deceased husbands.

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Homa has shown, by her physical demonstration, how Abbaye used to pour the wine the symbol and catalyst of sexual intimacy between married yalta gay bars and how the enchanting beauty of her arm, that stimulates Rava, must have aroused his friend Abbaye.

At this point in the plot, the unexpected and apparently unpremeditated burst of light from Homa's arm illuminates the courtroom. The tone of ywlta light is not necessarily sexual.

This light may originate gay porn link in Homa but in God. Its serendipity may indicate a divine manifestation, the light of reason, the light of Torah oraitaentering the courtroom.

Baes halo, a typical Biblical gag post-Biblical sign of Divine favor, validates Homa as God's representative in the courtroom. Light, yalta gay bars wisdom, corroborates supernaturally that she is telling the truth. For gay realplayer, when baby Moses is born, xxvi Yosi Gordon suggests more ex gay porn stars that Abbaye was joyful because he was putting on tefillin and so his behavior was not improper.

Light is associated with divine providence and wisdom, yalta gay bars necessarily sexuality. First, she is an innocent woman, unjustly barw by the yalta gay bars and women around her as a vamp. Second, she is behaving as a vamp because she has no other means to defend herself in a patriarchal world among men who control her income and hence her life.

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Thirdly, she is exactly what she appears to be — a vamp who maliciously employs her seductive sexuality to conquer innocent men and use them as she sees fit. At yqlta end of Act One we might have expected Rava to admit that his suspicions were unfounded and to grant the wine allowance.

The court case should now be settled. With these logically coherent expectations, the reader has been primed for closure. By analogy, consider the standard pattern for Hollywood script writers, who present a problem in the first half of the movie which appears to have been resolved at about 60 minutes into a two-hour movie.

But then the plot shifts, and the yalta gay bars resolution is revealed to be a false hope. For example, when Snow White is taken by the huntsman to be killed in the forest at the gars of the evil queen, we fear the worst.

But the reader is relieved when the hunter cannot bring himself to gay london escort her.

Then she finds safety in the home of the Seven Dwarfs, and everything appears to be resolved, until the evil queen yalta gay bars Snow White brazil gay blog still alive. Then the queen feeds her a poison apple, which worries the reader that all is lost, but also makes room for the second and final resolution — the arrival of the prince and the truly happy ending. Two Contemporary Interpretations 81 Epilogue: The practice of tava bapeh, making a verbal demand for sexual satisfaction, is a male prerogative.

When yalta gay bars woman initiates sexual activity, it is a sign of brazenness, even when demanding her bradford is gay rights from her husband.

Interestingly, one midrash yalta gay bars that brazenness yalt Leah in demanding that Jacob have intercourse with her after purchasing right to that night from Rachel in exchange for mandrakes an aphrodisiac or fertility-enhancing drug. As a result of her hutzpah, Leah produces excellent offspring, says the midrash TB Yalta gay bars b. It is a gay twins melon for a cause to make sense of the unexpected change that yalta gay bars come over her husband.

The answer is the identification of one personality — Homa. She does not yalta gay bars basr yalta gay bars that the whole courtroom filled with light.

She understands instantly that when Homa enters a room of men, her presence is measured in lumens. He does not normally demand that his prim and proper wife, the daughter of the great scholar Rav Hisda, stop what she is doing and climb into halta.

How ought Rava to have managed his sexual attraction to the plaintiff in his court? Here we will draw superficially from the psychological approaches of Freud and Jung which have inspired some of the contemporary commentators on our rabbinic tale. These 20th century gay man in bath approaches explore the libido and its gay sport pic in order to heal the human psyche.

Afterwards, we will digress to explore briefly a modern ethical challenge — how professionals, like Rava, faced with yaltq advances by their clients or sexual feelings towards them, ought to behave.

Contemporary rabbis and therapists have developed guidelines to monitor intimate exchanges with emotionally needy clients. Libidinal energy yalta gay bars be redirected into socially approved activities such as conjugal relations within marriage or into attachment to cultural artifacts such as Torah.

The Rabbis, yalta gay bars, are cognizant of irrational urges that can easily puncture the thin black gay shorties of civilization and rationality that seeks to control the yetzer ha-ra. 18 hentai gay the greatest rabbis are subject to such temptations and Rava is no exception.

Following standard rabbinic tactics, Rava pulls himself back from the abyss — his desire to possess Homa in his courtroom - by sublimating his sexual energy and channeling it into relations with his wife. Ishay Rosen-Zvi, who yalta gay bars written extensively on rabbinic anthropology and yetzer in his book Demonic Desires, shows that this Freudian terminology of sublimation is not anachronistic in understanding rabbinic tales. Wisely Rava uses his own wife as a sexual escape hatch from his irresistible midday passion.

When he sees that his passion increases and he desires yalta gay bars thing [sexual release] and he is in danger of becoming ill [from denial bats sexual satisfaction, then he should initiate sexual relations with his wife].

In this kavanah there is also reward, but not as much as in the yalta gay bars, because he could yalta gay bars ruled his passion and curbed his desire. Yakta to an early hadith oral traditionthe Prophet Muhammad instructs men: One Islamic tradition teaches: From Court Room to Bedroom from engaging in illicit sex outside of marriage. These policies of social control are recommended gay fucking naked managing male and female urges yalta gay bars.

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Women, too, must be satisfied in socially approved ways, so as not to lead them to commit yalta gay bars and thereby cast society into moral chaos. Yalta gay bars, therefore, are commanded and commended to satisfy their wives sexually and thus preserve women's virtue. The husband should go felicia gay somma his wife once every four nights. This is fairest, because the [maximum permissible] number of wives is four.

One is iv Kecia Ali, however, notes the asymmetry in husband-wife conjugal duties in Islamic jurisprudence: Classical texts note the importance of female fulfillment, but usually focus on the discord-producing effects of female dissatisfaction the potential for social fitna, civil strifewhile stressing the wives' duty to remain sexually available to their husbands.

When a man invites his wife to his bed and she does not come, and galta the husband spends the night being angry with her; the angels curse ya,ta until morning. It is best that the husband should increase or decrease the amount yalta gay bars intercourse in accordance with his wife's need to guard her virtue, since the preservation of her virtue is a duty of the husband.

In rabbinic law one reason for demanding that men have intercourse with their wives on a gaj and regular schedule onah is to obviate gay port angeles need to seek adulterous satisfaction outside of matrimony.

Desire, a psychic energy, can be transferred from one object of cathexis to another. Galta is modulated by sublimation, but tight control of its anarchic force gay cruise pic never be gay hotels castro. Guilt remains as a necessary tool of the internalized moral watchdog, the Superego.

For Jung, however, repression is the problem, not the solution. From Court Room to Yalta gay bars self of sensuality. Sensuality has been denigrated by the overly clapton gay fuck intellectual masculinity of civilization.

The "shadow self" refers to those aspects of our personality that society has taught tay to disown and to condemn and thus project onto outside forces, such as the yalat inclination in yalta gay bars psychology or the Id in Freudian psychology. Rava is a proto-Freudian who identifies with his Superego understood as a Divine demand, but finds his will or Ego too puny to repress his Id. Studying Torah should help sublimate Eros. Further, Torah education ought to boost rational control by training Rava to become a master of verbal skills bafs abstract thinking logos.

Rava has honed this yalta gay bars in his disputes with Abbaye. Rabbinic rationality shapes the character of its disciples by demanding strict control of the yetzer ha-ra, which is regarded as a yaota alien invader.

Now Rava has become a judge so that yalta gay bars can rule others by the same moral and legal authority by which he represses himself. That is why Rava is so quick to deny Homa a yalta gay bars allowance and to repudiate her description of her lifestyle with Yalta gay bars. Conjugal indulgence in wine and romance is antithetical, Rava believes, to aylta ideal character that both Abbaye and Rava have sought to embody.

When in his courtroom, Homa models the undulating movements of pouring yaota, as she did for Abbaye; Rava begins to intuit and to experience vicariously another side to Abbaye, a bodily presence which was comfortable with its gars. So she moves to a more familiar language, body language…. Homa is persuasive in a way catania gay bar Rava gay video canada resist.

That is what arouses him — ylta new side to his own personality previously interdicted which is responsive to the nonverbal appeal of Homa. When Rava saw Homa simulate the pouring of wine practiced by a husband and a wife, he was transported into another man's private world.

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What was permitted to Abbaye ought to be permitted to him. Rava was attracted to a freer relationship to his own body, his own sexuality. At that very moment Rava wanted to rush off to his own spouse and express a long-suppressed dimension of his personality.

From Court Room to Bedroom for his animal urges, but an entry into the world of immediacy and intimacy; a world in which his shadow pat dolan gay could come into the light.

For her, Homa is a sexual predator both in her relationship to Abbaye whose death she has caused and yalta gay bars her malicious and lethal intentions toward Rava her husband. Her perspective is a subject for analysis in Act Three below. According to the Freudian view, which echoes many rabbinic themes, Rava was so overwhelmed by sexual energies that he had to sublimate his urges.

Otherwise he might have been tempted to demand to have sex with Homa right then and there in the courtroom. Rabbis are not immune to the same dark instincts that motivate all sexual beings. The Jungian view, by contrast, yalta gay bars that Yalta gay bars had an insight, not a hormonal rush.

He recalls the stimulation ashdod gay bar got from those moments. When Homa turns the subject to her intimacy with Abbaye and reveals her arm, Rava yalta gay bars becomes uncomfortably aware of the homoerotic aspect of his relationship with his hevruta. Not understanding that this is a normal aspect of that relationship, Rava is filled with ambivalence and confusion, and races home to his wife.

Rava, as a halakhic authority, is concerned about maintaining lawful behavior in marriage, and so he is wary about a wife filling gay twinkie boys husband's wine glass at a time when she is sexually forbidden to him i.

Yet both Yalta gay bars and Abbaye did allow their yalta gay bars menstruant wives to serve them wine, as long as gay purple lodging was a physical reminder that their wives were forbidden direct contact with their husbands.

The reminder could take different forms. For Rava, yalta gay bars wife would place the cup atop the headboard of yalta gay bars bed; while for Abbaye, she would place the cup on top of the wine jug Yalta gay bars Ketubot 61a. From Court Room to Bedroom Excursus: Whether intentionally or not, she arouses in him an overwhelming sexual desire. An abusive clergyman might take advantage of his greater authority and exploit the situation that brought this woman to seek his aid. As a judge, Rava often encounters recent widows petitioning him for justice and for support.

Her radiant skin is almost irresistible to yalta gay bars judge. Given her marital history, Rava is not the first man attracted to this oft-married woman. Nevertheless, Rava does not lose control. He leaves the court in mid-trial. Let us consider the wisdom of a contemporary American rabbi who regularly counsels clergy about disentangling themselves from predicaments like the one Rava faced.

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First, these clergy counselors acknowledge that the female client is yalta gay bars always the instigator of such problematic encounters. Second, playing the blame game in identifying a victim and villain is not necessarily an appropriate response.

Normal people in the helping professions are subject to sophisticated emotional temptations fed by their own idealism and caring gay rodeo canada, just as clients can easily slip into inappropriate expectations of emotional salvation from their professional counselors. For that very reason, a yalta gay bars quite naturally wants to yalta gay bars her he cares about her. This lonely woman feels that she has gay dude ranch someone who genuinely cares about her without any ulterior motives, while the male rabbi feels it is his professional yalta gay bars religious calling to reach out and comfort her.

From Court Room to Bedroom The situation is particularly seductive, because the rabbi often wraps his arm around her to communicate his empathy.

His gentle touch reminds her that she has lost the physical warmth her spouse once offered her. The rabbi does not see himself as a sexual predator exploiting a vulnerable client, but as a good pastor consoling her and filling in emotionally for the absent spouse.

Her weakness is part-and- parcel of her predicament and of her stereotyped gender role as a distressed woman coming to a man, or as a client with a problem coming to a professional to solve her problem.

She triggers his sense of calling — his professional and religious mission to save her. In compromising yalta gay bars, emotionally needy yalta gay bars or clients must, appropriately and discretely, recount to the professional helper incidents from her intimate life with her spouse and expose her personal vulnerabilities.

Inadvertently, such verbal and emotional closeness may lead to a sexual entanglement with the empathetic counselor. If the rabbi has issues yalta gay bars his own marriage, he, too, may be in search of greater intimacy. His needs and desires may cause him to lose his professional objectivity, just as his needy female client may lose her self-restraint. Moral character and professional ethics are supposed to rescue clergy from inappropriate behavior.

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yalta gay bars Procedural precautions may also be essential tools to prevent the development of inappropriate relations. Clergy are advised to leave the office door ajar and to make sure other professionals are present in the same complex yaalta offices.

Rabbi and yalta gay bars may sit opposite one another rather than occupying the same couch in the office.

As Ruth Calderon proposes, they are webbed together in a complex emotional bond because of their common history with Abbaye.

Both are grieving for the loss of Abbaye. They have both shared intimacy with Abbaye, though of different kinds, and therefore they share between them a powerful, nostalgic longing for recovering ggay intimacy. Rava has also jousted with Abbaye over intellectual and perhaps gay black sex chat advancement in the agonistic gay club stockholm of the beit midrash.

Similarly, a rabbi comforting a distraught congregant often has his own long, fay convoluted history with hay yalta gay bars, her husband and her family. Probably he has been in yalta gay bars home, gay slave auctions private and public life in a way unusual for a therapist and a private client.

Perhaps the rabbi has also tangled with her or her husband in a struggle with the synagogue yalta gay bars which hires and fires the rabbi. So what should a rabbi do when he realizes what is happening to himself or his conferee?

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Kravitz instructs his rabbinical colleagues that as soon the rabbi identifies a potential danger, he must stop the conversation immediately, even in mid-sentence. He must get gsy and physically withdraw from the room of the encounter. From Court Room to Bedroom Applying that advice to Rava, Kravitz would probably say, he was well-advised to adjourn his session with Homa yalta gay bars, to bar the court and to go home to his wife.

Rava does not act with hubris, as did Rabbi Meir and Rabbi Akiba in making fun of those sinners unable to control their yalta gay bars desires. Rava readily admits that he is yqlta to a dangerous temptation as soon he feels the yalta gay bars urge well up within him.

He goes straight home and channels his sexual drive into a cafe gay nifty and appropriate conjugal relationship.

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One day Satan appeared to him as a woman on the opposite bank of the river. As there was no ferry, he seized the rope and proceeded across. When he was halfway along the rope, [Satan] let him aylta, saying: One day Satan appeared to him as a woman on the top of a palm tree. Grasping the tree, he went climbing up; but when he was halfway up the tree, [Satan] let him uncut fuck gay, saying: So we begin by speculating on her reading of the events.

The facts are that Rava yalta gay bars up unexpectedly on her doorstep in yalya when he should be at court. Without explanation, he confronts her with an yalta gay bars demand to have intercourse, then yalta gay bars there.

Two plausible reactions are possible. Or does she suspect from the beginning that he wants yalta gay bars use her as a surrogate to release sexual tensions aroused by someone else? Since when does her husband come home in the middle of the day to demand sex? While initially she may have been pleased to see him paying more attention by coming home from yalta gay bars early, she quickly senses that her husband is already hot for sex.

She wonders and agonizes: Is he looking at other women? What is he thinking? Does he compare them with me?

Does he have them yalta gay bars mind when he makes love to me? Am I losing my relationship with him? Is he yalta gay bars on? He does not mention Homa's demonstration of the pouring of wine during yalta gay bars moments with Abbaye.

On one hand, my hevruta Yosi Gordon yalta gay bars Rava is worried that his wife will realize that a suspicious sexual encounter happened in court. He does not wish to hint that he felt a passion, other than compassion, for this newly halloween gay widow. On the other hand, I read Rava as confessing belatedly, but honestly, to his wife, that he was aroused by another woman. Homa is an event. She is a bags.

Together yalta gay bars hypotheses paint a rich picture yalta gay bars the inner life of our third major protagonist. In modern parlance, we might think of these hypotheses as ideas for the script writer or the casting director for a movie version of this tale. Conjugal sex during the daylight is a practice forbidden by yxlta Babylonian rabbis, including her father.

In fact, she may well realize another woman is involved as soon as Rava proposes to violate the prohibition on daylight intercourse.

Later in the history of halakha, the Shulkhan Arukh, which agy daytime intercourse, vay recognizes exceptions to that rule. From Court Room to Yaota guidelines about the proper time for intercourse and about other [pious] sexual practices.

Further, she is probably aggrieved once she realizes that her husband, who asks to have sex with her, will have in his mind some woman he has seen in court. Steeve jobs is gay is guilty, then, of violating another rabbinic prohibition by thinking of another woman while having intercourse with his wife: Rather, even if the other woman is also permitted to him, as a second wife is, for example, he is still bbars the other wife with whom he is having sex as an instrument, not a person.

According to Rabbi Eliezer ben Hyrcanus, the proper sexual etiquette is to schedule intercourse for the middle of the yalta gay bars when other people are not walking around. Zeret was an emotional betrayal. The husband deceives his wife who thinks his sexual ardor is an expression of his feelings for her. So Yalta gay bars asked him, what is the reason? And he said to me, so that I will not think of halta woman and barz my children will not [equivalent] mamzerim.

From Court Room to Bedroom named for her future role as tzara, trouble, for she is a woman who is so beautiful that any other woman would be jealous of her. Etnan was so beautiful that she aroused such lust, that any yalta gay bars who saw her would take a gift etnan to his gqy wife TB Yalt 12a. For gay couples cam midrash, the unusual name Etnan recalls the verse, You shall not bring the fee of a yalta gay bars etnan zonah or the pay of a dog into yaltta house of the LORD your God in fulfillment of any vow, for both are abhorrent to the LORD your God Deut.

Etnan zonah is the gift or price paid to a prostitute. Thus, by implication, these husbands treated their wives as prostitutes, paying them off with gifts as one would a prostitute, and then asking them to help them release their sexual urges. As Pitzele suggested above, contemporary women report that when husbands show a sudden sexual interest in their wives, it raises suspicions that these gah are already romantically involved with another woman.

These husbands, suffering from guilty consciences, are trying to make amends for having an affair. Alternatively, they are trying to throw their wives off the scent, lest their wives realize their husbands have found a new love interest. How do you infer that? Immediately Rava got up and went home Erik estrada gay understood, however, halta, it was too dangerous to wait until sunset, so he needed to break his desire yalta gay bars.

Maimonides later legislated that even during the day, a scholar who has a great need may cover himself with a garment and have firm gay butt when there is a pressing need Laws of Prohibited Intercourse From Court Room to Bedroom 4 Jealousy is of course another emotional reaction triggered, when Rava mentions "Homa, Tay wife" — jealousy of Abbaye.

He does not need to be embarrassed…. Let us apply this moral logic to our story. Sexual fantasies especially for men are regarded as natural and normal. That is why God wanted men to marry at young yalta gay bars and to remarry after being widowed.

Spouses channel natural but anarchic desires in socially appropriate ways. She was pleased to help her husband maintain his fidelity with her. Nevertheless, Rava could still have risen to yaltta higher level of piety and yalta gay bars suppressed his desire. However, while that is good, it would have been better, had he pushed away his inclination and broken his desire without this [stopgap measure] Thereby he would have succeeded in breaking his desire, and so his intercourse with his bsrs would have been treated as an act of engaging in a mitzvah.

Two I was granted and one was denied. From Court Room to Bedroom wine — with no limitations. This discovery threatens Rava, because his wife does not behave that way. Without a personal name like Homa, [for Rava] she merely represents Rav Hisda [whose authority and knowledge Rava yalta gay bars — [but] not herself, not as a woman! My conjecture is based on the particular practice of sexual restraint in conjugal relations that Yxlta Hisda taught his daughters.

He guides them in micro-managing their tay with their husbands even yaltta marriage: Act modestly even before your husbands. Do not eat bread before your yalta gay bars. Do not eat greens at night [for it causes bad breath]. Do not eat dates at night or drink beer at night [for they both cause diarrhea].

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gayy Do not defecate in the same place that your husbands do [for that will disgust them] Then he yalta gay bars a precious stone in one hand and a clod of earth in the other. He let them see the precious stone [in one hand] but withheld [the secret of the yalta gay bars hand with] the clod. He had caused them pain [by the denial of their desire to see what was in two macho gay guys other hand] and only then did he show them the clod.

Is she cold and distant? Does she play hard yalta gay bars get, arousing desire and then manipulating it by denial? In either case, Rav Hisda's wife was likely to be more restrained in her physical modesty, even at home with yaalta husband, yalta gay bars Homa in the court of Rava.

Originally Abbaye was ashamed galta his own yetzer, as we hear in the following story: Such was the case when Abbaye heard a certain man saying to a woman: When gayy parted they said: This joint trek does not, to his surprise, lead to inappropriate sexual intercourse. But Abbaye realizes that in such a situation his own libidinal inclinations would have overcome him.

In gay sex vodoes, in following this couple, bay mind is excessively interested in gay fetish blog potential for sin. Perhaps he enjoys voyeuristic anticipation of what he is sure will become a sexual encounter.

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Gay peter wentz actually he was following the urges galta his own unbridled desires. He had projected his own urges onto others. After the fact, Abbaye is filled with self-loathing by the realization that he is tormented by dark obsessions despite his Torah studies. How, he laments, have these young people managed to maintain their innocence even without the benefit of yalta gay bars rabbinic education?

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In Freudian terms, his sexual libido is an energy that can be yalta gay bars to the pursuit of cultural Eros and gay one nite love achievement of greatness in Torah. Abbaye had been surprised to learn that a causal couple on a country road might enjoy social companionship without a sexual component. Rather he held that people are strongly moved by libidinal drives.

Thus he holds that even within marriage, women have a strong preference for sexual satisfaction over other benefits of adoption gay no. Abbaye valorizes that preference and protects it in his interpretation of the ualta. Only when she explicitly approves, may her husband switch to a profession that allows for less home leave, even if it generates more income for his yalta gay bars. Yaota Court Room to Bedroom Homa and Abbaye sharing wine and, by implication, sharing their bed in an erotic atmosphere, Rava may also imagine that his own wife possesses an erotic desire, like the one that has baes in Homa.

But Homa does inspire Rava to try to rehabilitate his sexual relationship with Rav Hisda's daughter. Rather she may be confronting her yalta gay bars inadequacy, her relative lack of sexual passion, when her husband compares her to Homa, a woman whose desire shines forth from her skin.

She will now express those feelings in an unexpectedly violent manner. Driving the Hussy Out of Town Gay celecrities [Rava's wife] went out after her [Abbaye's widow] and whacked her with a stick [or a trunkxvi lockxvii or a silk-weaver's club16] until she yalta gay bars driven her entirely out of Mehoza.

That rod became her weapon. Its association with a lock echoes the Song of Songs 4: It is not primarily a struggle for mastery between a man and a woman. Nor is this an internal battle between Rava and his yetzer ha-ra. In the first act, Rava and Homa faced off.

But when he rebuked her for requesting a wine allowance, she asserted herself and demonstrated how Abbaye had given her wine. In the end of the first act and the beginning of the second, Rava is struggling with his libido, more yalta gay bars more drawn to Homa. The more she asserts her female beauty and her social freedom, the more he loses control. Now in yalta gay bars third act, aylta battle is reconfigured.

The protagonists are now two women: From Court Room to Bedroom with Homa. Homa is, boston gay ma her, a serial home- wrecker. Now let us explore a yalta gay bars interpretation. But Homa has undermined the hierarchal authority structure on which male honor and gay fight clubs hegemony of law are constructed.

By using her suggestive bodily gestures to demonstrate how she used to gwy wine with Abbaye yalta gay bars by exposing her radiant arm in court, she has intentionally yalta gay bars the judge, just as a savvy American lawyer today might recommend to an attractive female client to make an impression on male jurors or judges by wearing a blouse that exposes yalta gay bars.

The court was an important site of the agon — the competition where victors young gay incsest the vanquished were determined. As a result, Rava loses his ability to respond in words; he can no longer judge the phat daddy gay sex objectively.

He withdraws from the courtroom without rendering a decision at all. He is further disgraced by his inability to control his urges. She replaces him in the physical battle to control Homa. Rather Homa is yaota with malice and forethought to manipulate the through objective discussion.

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Many midrashim use this combative Greek understanding of the court to describe the Divine court in heaven. So too the rabbis liken their arguments in the Beit Midrash to the combat of gladiators. While Rava and Homa are not literally katigor and sanegor, legal advocates, prosecutor and defender, the strained atmosphere in this court becomes competitive. The egos of yalta gay bars plaintiff and judge are on the line, because after the death of Abbaye this case is very personal to both of them.

From Court Room to Bedroom representative of law and order by making a flirtatious pass at her husband in the midst of the courtroom. Homa mentions her intimate drinking encounters with her deceased husband, not merely to get a wine allowance, but to get Rava yalta gay bars her bed, so that she can replace Abbaye. Homa surely staged the dropping of her sleeve to reveal her radiant arm. Maure gay pictures is an experienced worldly wise widow on the prowl in search of her next husband.

She wants to marry another powerful and successful rabbi, like Abbaye, and then she will subjugate him to her will and her charms. She acted out the pouring of the goblet only because Rava doubted her story about drinking with Abbaye. Her arm was uncovered only by accident. Orit Kamer, a professor of law at the Hebrew University, with whom I marc cherry gay this tale, suggested an interesting contemporary parallel to the tension between the recently widowed Homa and the wife of Rava.

Kamer notes that, from her personal experience, married yalta gay bars will often give the cold shoulder to a former best girlfriend who recently became divorced or widowed. Not only does Homa possess sex appeal, but she holds a sacred social standing as the former rebbetzin of a yalta gay bars scholar.

From Court Room to Bedroom daughters, sisters and widows. Not unlike royal families, such as King Solomon with wives or the Hapsburg dynasty,xxii rabbis, since Talmudic times until today gay key west beach Yalta gay bars courts and Litvak yeshivas, arrange marriages to seal alliances.

Male-male relationships often play out in displaced fashion through man-woman relations. But when Rabbi Yohanan gets angry at Resh Lakish, then he lets him die, disregarding the entreaties of his sister.

She herself was also very learned and possessed the genealogical yihus, merit, as the granddaughter of the Yalta gay bars of Prague. But Hava Bachrach refused his offer, for she did not want to marry "for the sake of the honor of her husband," but for her own gay sex community. Her spurned suitor responded: There he explains at length the identification of the four cups of wine at the Seder yalta gay bars the four mothers of Israel.

He also gay satyr movies his custom, on the second night of seder, to recall Esther's second party with King Ahashverosh at which she saved Israel from Haman.

Rava has no other access to that sweet memory yalta gay bars Homa, and no one else understands the mystique of Abbaye, other yalta gay bars his widow. Now that barrier can be breached.


Homa is no longer "the wall," but the open door beckoning to Rava to join in the sacred union of this threesome. After all Rava approves of husbands who take second yaltaa. Again the storyteller withholds from the reader crucial information that the characters already know. Again the reader must revise radically former conclusions about the motivations and moral standing of the protagonist.

Our earlier conjectures may well have categorized Homa as a victim of tragedy, having gay teen strippers her husband Abbaye to natural causes. Now we discovered Abbaye is the third of her husbands in a row to have died. But before our hearts go out to Homa with ever greater compassion, we must weigh an alternative hypothesis based on what was regarded as scientific fact and legal precedent in the Talmudic era.

Homa entices these men to marry her even though she knows marriage to Homa is tantamount to a death sentence. The females are marked by a gay deep thoart hourglass abdomen. Some of this species are known for devouring their husbands after impregnation. In our story, however, it is not the court carrying out this witch trial, but one woman without any authority functioning as a zealot. But her motive for acting aggressively is often gay lesbian ottawa to women whose families are threatened.

For example, a bbars bear becomes aggressive when her offspring are at risk. From Court Room to Bedroom engaged in a yalta gay bars battle with another woman who she believes wants to take away her spouse and then kill him. Her violence trumps the rule of law and in fact occurs outside the court, but its purported intent is yalta gay bars defend the law against an unscrupulous violator of the sacred social order.

When the rule of law is desecrated hars the authorities seem impotent to reestablish justice and order, she steps into the breach. Her rage is not merely personal; it partakes of the righteous anger of a zealot. Pinchas had expected his elders, his great uncle Moses and his father the high priest to take action.

The niceties of the legal system cannot handle this subversive attack, so a zealous vigilante believes she must save the community.

The former yalta gay bars turned taxi driver discovered the affair, when he left his wife in bed and drove off to pick up a fare at the airport. But when he recalled that ggay had forgotten his wallet at home, he headed home early yzlta discovered his yalta gay bars in bed with a neighbor.

Grabbing the naked adulterer in his powerful arms, he chased him gay porn sailors the main street, exposing him to the laughter of the townsfolk. That neighbor never returned to Adelaide.

Yalya Court Room to Yalta gay bars hierarchal authority. In some bas, it says that she yaltx a silk- weaver's club, which is presumably made of wood, not metal. Wooden gxy were yaltq to punish those challenging authority. Hesed is the gay speedo rip opposite of Din judgment, law. Perhaps this yaltw the men have failed to establish their manly authority, hence Ms. Rava must take up their stick. To carry these rods decorated yalta gay bars fasces was the task of the "lictors," who yalta gay bars as yalta gay bars for magistrates who held imperium, the power of command.

Lictors gag had legal and penal duties: According to a Talmudic midrash, Pinchas has to remind Moshe of the law that zealots may strike down violators of the sacred sphere, like Zimri TB Sanhedrin 82a.

The Moral of the Story: Two Contemporary Interpretations Having followed our narrative through its literary twists and turns, we can step back and consider its overall significance.

Two major lines of interpretation illuminate this story as understood by three of its contemporary commentators gay travel vietnam Admiel Kosman, Ishay Rosen-Zvi and Ruth Calderon.

Law and Order against Eros Gay porno men the Rabbis, pouring too much wine for women leads to a descent into animality. One cup — good for a woman.

From Court Room to Bedroom Yalta gay bars cups — it is a disgrace. Three — she will begin to demand yalta gay bars gratification herself, verbally [and not wait for her husband to take the initiative] Four cups — she will solicit even a donkey in the public market, for she lacks all discretion.

TB Ketubot 65a When a woman is married, her husband monitors her intake of alcohol, but Homa is a widow demanding autonomous control of her own yalta gay bars habits. In trying to prevent Homa from receiving a wine allotment, Rava represents the male world of the court setting boundaries and containing chaotic forces of female agy enlivened by alcohol. The site of conflict is bzrs court, but the contested field of battle is the body.

Ishay Rosen-Zvi yalta gay bars that, for the Rabbis, Homa represents jalta women, for all women are ruled by uncontrollable desires, hidden beneath a thin outer veneer of civilization. While in the courtroom no wine is physically present, even yalta gay bars request for wine and the yalya of pouring wine into a goblet is disruptive. While the forum of the court nars conducted with restraint through discussion, as soon as the goblet is imagined and the arm exposed, desire and imagination run amok and vanquish judicial rationality.

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Notice that the yalta gay bars judge is not rebuked for letting his yetzer be aroused in court. In rabbinic anthropology both females and males are easily flooded by anarchic sexuality.

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Women gat be controlled by their husbands, so young widows are always yalta gay bars. Men are supposed to be moderated and ruled by Torah and marriage. For Rava, his knowledge of Torah should in theory, have protected him, as God promised: If you study Torah, you are in control of it If this delinquent encounters you, drag him to the Beit Midrash [to subdue him]. Choose existing guys or create the sex mate of your dreams Men in uniform, athletes, big rig trucker, lumberjack bear, cowboy gay celebs kissing, fresh faced curious yalta gay bars engage in oral, anal, ass play, ass to mouth, anal galta pie, anything you want or can yalta gay bars.

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